CHECK IT HOLMES IT'S SHERLOCK!

Any fans of The Mighty Boosh might recognise the legacy my Lahndanowes to the creepy gravelly voiced Eel Man...



The Eel Song for those unfamiliar with his slippery slimy waaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyss!!!!!


And for any Ringers out there...CAN'T WAIT FOR THIS!!!

RIDE ON!

Okay, so I wouldn't say I'm the bravest person in the wrold...stupid (I have nealt electricuted myself twice and have eaten a scorpion..that as they say is for another day) but most definitely not brave. And when it comes to fairground rides they are not really my top priority for enjoyment. Admittedly I've got up on a few dodgy ones in the past (ooh er missus!) but being the selfless, courageous reporter that I am entertainement.ie asked me to head along to the 7UP Winter Wonderland in Kilmainham Gardens. Luckily, I had a six month tour of duty in deepest Afghanistan to prepare me!

MASTERCHEF & MO'FOS!

MASTERCHEF & MO'FOS!

LATEST ION VIDEOS:

ION crew headed along to the Taste of Christmas show at the Convention Centre (on the quays in Dublin, building looks like God dropped a can and hasn't bothered picking it up) recently to meet the Masterchef Maestros Dylan McGrath and Nick Munier. I was a massive fan of the show when it was on and so I decided to make something very special for the lads to critique...


"Will they think it looks like sick or will it do the trick!"





Last night was the celebration of Hairy Lipped Hare-krishas all across the world with the Tripod in Dublin looking like the casting stage of a dodgy 70s porn movie...It was wall to wall sausage as the uber upper-lipped brigade paraded their magnificent mushers to the world before attacking them with the wilkinson sword...

This year alone they reckon they have already raised close to €80 million worldwide as men relinquish the razor for one month. That's a lot of lives saved from prostate cancer.

TWILIGHT: BREAKING DAWN.

Popped or should I say flew along to the early exclusive screening of Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part 1 (strange name I don't see what Dawn did to deserve that). So I donned my best Edward Cullen get up, (sparkly face, Victorian manners, poetry book etc) and headed along to chat to a few crazy Twihards:

Latest ION Videos

What a FOUR-king weekend!

As if Friday wasn't enough excitement!

On Thursday I met one of my assured comedy heroes in the shape of the man mountain that it Dara O' Briain. He is like our very own Stephen Fry in the national treasure sense, has a massive presence yet a gentle giantness that doesn't involve throwing cars at building in a temper or ripping up 200 hundred year old Oak trees from their roots...NO, this man is a giant of comedy. The BFG (Big Funny Giant) and I chatted before and after his gig at the eircom spider awards... it's the Oscars for Internet people.



On Saturday, still reeling in wonderment and with a permanent silly smile of disbelief after the 4-0 result against Estonia, I found myself listening to Radiohead's The Bends on my Steve Jobs while simultaneously waiting in a media room to interview Jedward. It was a psychologically scarring musical paradox and I am still dealing with it.(lots of crying in cold showers) While a lot of you maay have been enjoying this incredible feat by the feet of Ronan O Gara...I was the filling in a "Jedward sandwich"...

Smuggling turtles in bread...
Wet T-Shirt Competitions...
Draft lists for Santa...

It can only be Jedworld.



"Stuck in the middle with you!"

Also spoke to the very sound JLS guys...

and asked Oritsé about a certain HOT X Factor lady by the name of Kelly Rowland!

Dublin City Marathon 2011

ION @ The Dublin Marathon 2011

There was a time when a "marathon" just involved peeling a wrapper and munching down on a solid rectangle brick of peanut, caramel chocolate and dried squirrel balls* NOW, not only have they changed it to Snickers but it also involves 42 km of gruelling running from one point to another point...Henry Ford is rolling in his grave people!!!

Well, he may have given us the motor car but these 14,000 runners are giving a lot more. Blood, sweat, tears, joy, and most importantly over €10 MILLION raised for charity.

These people are legends. WE spoke to a Lion, a Zombie, Santa Claus, The Ghostbusters, a blind woman who is running her THIRD marathon, Ray D'Arcy the ~TodayFM main man at the finish line, and many more.

*this was regaled to me by a man who drank turps for tea, often ate his own underpants and once sucked a fart out of his own arse when using a lift. Therefore it is hearsay and comment and I'm clearing myself of libel in this instance. Phew!

So, let your finger loose on the play button and enjoy the Dublin City Marathon 2011 as seen through the eyes of ION:

Battlefield 3 Launch

BULLETS HOVER BROADLY!!

It was a treacherous night on Friday last when I was given the unenviable mission of getting to the Tripod club in Dublin city centre to attend the launch of Battlefield 3.

As you will see from the video myself and the cameraman Matt had to dive falling bombs, dodge bullets as they whizzed past our ears, and of course manage to give the best goddam piece to camera of my life *raises fist to the sky* ;-)

There's also an interview with English/Irish singer and rapper Maverick Sabre who is fast becoming real hot property on the music scene. A very talented young man who also happens to be very sound. Nice mix.



Here's his latest video. Filmed in Wexford.

No, that is not a pair of ratty torn knickers on my head...it's supposed to be a web...honest!




It's a pretty nifty video. It's by Matt Sullivan and he resides in the rebel county...check out his other stuff here: www.cameraoperator.ie

Forget The Hamster...It's time for THE GERBIL!!!!

FANCY WATCHING MY THREESOME?

HELP!!!!

Don't worry I'm not stuck at the back of the fridge after mistakenly underestimating the length of my arms in a futile bid to get a plug into a socket.

ION went along to the Irish Premiere of The Help. Based on the book by Kathryn Stockett, which sold 5 million copies, this is the film version and it has already mirrored the success of the book taking in over 300million worldwide and 4 weeks at the top of the US Box Office.

We spoke to Director Tate Taylor and star Octavia Spencer who plays Minny (the whisper on the street is that she could be a shoe-in for Best Supporting Oscar. You heard it hear first.

...now where's that fecking plug....ooooooh ;)

BLOG TIME NO SEE!

I am officially the worst most inconsistent poster of blog updates since Jesus himself set up thechosenone@blogspot.com let's face it he hasn't updated in over 2,000 years so at least I'm not as bad as him but then again he has a couple a billion followers...I have you five. And, I love you all.

So, to make up for my lack of scribing and for the two people who still check my blog every other month (never mind that other three) I thank you very much you beautiful human species. Here is a selection of the most recent videos I have made for ION.

If you likey leave a comment on youtube or send to friends or fans of the old Rooster...the tall guy has a national radio station at his disposal so I'm using good old fashioned lick arsing to get my stuff out there...thanks. Again, did I mention how good you are looking today..ooooooohhhh that leopard vest and leather rain coat are like soooooo hot!!!

Don your flatcaps and start your wellies:

PLOUGHING CHAMPS: PART 1



PLOUGHING CHAMPS: PART 2



Scissor Sisters, Stereophonics, The Saturdays, Bell X1 and loads more for the Arthur's Day Red Carpet....Expect some saucy shenanigans with the Scissor Sisters - Fingering & Langers!



ION@CULTURE NIGHT

Time to Plug out of the Picnic! Now to recharge.

 

Grouplove in a tent? No, a teepee!!

Yes, it was an electric weekend up in Stradbally. Only a little driving misty sideways wetness on Friday night to dampen some of the crowd's resolve but otherwise a glorious sunny escapade. Had to stay pretty sane for the entire weekend as this is the first festival I've ever officially worked in a media capacity. This meant heading early to bed on Friday (2am) so I could be fresh for the interviews...however my plans were scuppered by a shouty twat who insisted on singing the first two lines of the National Anthem and then repeating them..again...and again...and again and if that wasn't enough he insisted on singing yes you guessed it the first two lines to Nothing Compares to You by Sinead O Connor. "A voice like Celine Dion Ted", he did not. 'Mr Two Lines Man'. Always a popular punter wherever you go. I buried him in the woods.

Saturday was crazy with bands to be interviewed and crazy things to do and see in the 600 acres of electric eclectic madness.  There's loads of clips from the crowd, festival food, weddings in blow-up churches, people pumping hard, rolling boobs down hills, (this should really be a new spectator sport!!, the incredible backwards walking man! 37 secs in on same video) dancing, screaming, pies and a huge collection of crazy sunglasses and clothing!

We have interviews with fine Irish up and coming bands who will be household names soon enough. There's Shouting at Planes, Cocophone, Katie Kim, Hot Sprockets, Favourite Sons, The Gorgeous Colours - a real mix of some great Irish Acts. Comedy comes in the form of Dermot Whelan (in which he said his coat was made of chickpeas so I had to lick it to check!) and the great Foil, Arms and Hog. Check them all out here: http://entertainment.ie/eitv/ion.asp

There's also the King of DJ's and the one that every person who has ever bought a vinyl, attempted to scratch or just fancied themselves as a bedroom DJ then this man needs no endtroduction: DJ Shadow. He's a very serious guy when talking about music. He don't mess around. It was just before his gig and I'd say that he approaches a set like a General going into battle. I offered him a treatsize Curly Wurly, but he's not a fan ;-) Also spoke to a band called Grouplove...they're from the States and will be huuuge I'd say. Click on the pic above to see me carry out my psychic test and a collective high five vibe!

Here's one of their songs, 'Tongue-tied' I reckon big things are on the horizon. Very catchy track.



Just click on the pic for full interview:

My shadow. Nothing to do with the DJ. Although DJ tripod springs to mind! scary.

Mad for Trad in the Body & Soul. Mental!

DJ Shadow does his stuff

Poetry at a festival. Rock and Roll!!

"Did you hear the one about a Banana, Shark and a Bearded Laydee?"

I hope to be back :-)

FRIGHT NIGHT PREMIERE

Christopher Mintz-Plasse (Red Mist, McLovin) and Anton Yelchin (Star Trek's Chekov) both at the Cineworld cinema in Dublin for the premiere of this remake of the 1985 Horror Classic - Fright Night!

Check out our Hammer Horror inspired video (I robbed the axe off a poster!)

There's also a very funny story from one of the fans who met the two stars in a lift and didn't know who they were but asked them if they were going to see the movie. Very funny. I also managed to squeeze out of the two lads the female they would most likely want to get their vampire teeth into ;-P




Trailer for the movie...the 3D really works with the gore flying out at you! It's not going to win any Oscars but you can see Colin Farrell relishing the Jerry Vampire role...you could say he really gets his teeth into it... sorry, I'll get my coat.

Couple of cool videos that I just watched and liked to share...

The effects in this are fantastic considering it most probably had a small budget...leads me to think that it may be a viral for a video game? Otherwise, brilliant shooting and clever little flips, I had to rewind a few times to work out where she was going!



The guy who made this must have the patience of a Nick Park (Aardman Animations genius) because each person (500 in total) has to hold a different photograph (he developed 1,500 photos..maniac) in order for it to give the illusion that it is moving...to be honest I think he has too much time on his hands...apart from a photograph that is ;-/

Whoa...that was liquid football!

HE MUST HAVE A FOOT LIKE TRACTION ENGINE!!!!

At least one team called The Hoops are through to European football. Shame on Celtic by being hammered by a bunch of part-timers (to be honest the Scottish League has held no interest for me in recent years) It is like watching two angry bears fight over squatting rights in the woods as a load of wide eyed little animals look on...oooohhhh we might nick a point off either of ye and that'll make our season...nah pointless.

On the other hand, Shamrock Rovers have made a Europa League that would have only caught the attention of Liverpool and Tottenham Hotspur fans much more interesting a viewing experience.

This volley alone is worth about a million quid to The Hoops:



It reminded me of:



And I missed that goal because I was reporting for ION on the Future Bright showcase for new emerging Irish Music talent at Crawdaddy's:

HIP-OP HURRAY OOOOOHHH :-/

I have only been able to watch this clip from the Lovely Girls Competition once. I can't actually even force myself through latticed fingers and a fist in the mouth hiding and shaking behind the sofa to view this horror one more time. 'Hip-hop'? Erm...more like a drunken epileptic mating fit designed to engage the opposite sex at approximately 3am of a Saturday night.

Look but beware of a dangerous level of cringe!



Less cringeful but can be viewed more than once:

LOST IN TRANSLATION:

Trying to get the biggest ride of my life!

Spent Saturday soaking up the buzz of the 2011 Fleadh Cheoil na hEireann up in sunny Cavan... and when I say sunny twas actually schplitting schtones! Couldn't beleive how great the weather was and the people were great craic. If you look closely enough you will see me pause after the Dutch man Dan answers where he is from...I had to stop my myselkf from answering in a really ropey Dutch attempted accent..."Oh well yesshhhhh that would be the drughhhhhhhhssssss and the shexxxxxxxx yessshhhh!"

KEANE TO GO (ANYWHERE!)

Head over heels about moving to The Hills?

One thing I noticed about the Robbie rocket move to L.A. Galaxy was how happy he was to be heading to join David ("I din't fink dey was permanent tattooes Victowea...oh shit!") Beckham and the lads in the Hollywood Hills. Here's a little selection of various quotes that RK gave to the press when joining any number of the clubs he has been a part of in his career. It's funny to see how many boyhood dreams he has fulfilled and just how many clubs are so close to his heart ;-)

"I have always wanted to come and play in MLS so it's the perfect combination for me and a dream come true" - Robbie Keane reveals his joy at a £3.5m move from Tottenham to LA Galaxy. Obviously.

But, haven't we heard that before...ummmm.


20 August 1999: "It has always been my dream to play in the Premiership and I'm over the moon to be joining Coventry."
31 July 2000: "It's every kid's dream come true. I am absolutely delighted at the prospect of joining a world-famous club like Inter."
14 May 2007: "They say five clubs and all that, but I am very settled here [at Spurs] and am really enjoying it."
28 July 2008: "I've been a Liverpool fan all my life, going back to when I was a kid growing up in Dublin, and I always had a Liverpool shirt on my back. To be sitting here today in a Liverpool tracksuit is a dream come true."
6 February 2009: "I'm delighted to be back [at Spurs]. This is a club that's dear to my heart."
1 February 2010: "I am a Celtic fan and did not have to ask much about it. I always wanted to play for Celtic and it works for all parties."
31 January 2011: "I'm ready to help West Ham stay up. I feel I have plenty left to offer at the highest level for at least the next four or five years."

As long as he keeps popping them in for fun in a green shirt he can fecking play for Rangers...well okay maybe not but you get the idea ;-P

OMG! THEY KILKENNY

This week I had my ION The Kilkenny Arts Festival

Yes, with apologies to South Park. I'm afraid that is actually the second time I have robbed that joke and used it in print ( is still actually have the page from the paper!). The first being my stint at the Irish Examiner back in the second neolithic cave man Jurassic dinosaur flare wearing days of the early 2000s...Ahhhhhh remember them heady days when a hedge fund was just used to pay the gardener.

Anyhoo, I spent Saturday with the great and good of the KAF and ran around like a badger exiting an all night rave to cast a spell over that cracking city and to undertake some Top Gear style challenges...one being to hunt down Gemma Hayes in a church another to get a rabbit hat fashioned from balloons and another to find a reclining naked man!

Here's the video. Hope you likey!

Did all this rioting start with a pair of jeans?





With all this rioting and stock market crashing..thank f*ck for Harrison Ford!




Although he really does remind me of 'The Brain' from Pinky & The Brain (don't know this classic cartoon...Google now!) Rupert Murdoch is possibly the most powerful man in media and no matter how the hacking scandal damages him he will still dive like Scrooge McDuck (Google now!) into a swimming pool of cash. At least we can console ourselves that one of the richecst and scariest men in the world still looks like a div in a pair of shorts and a cap. Sharon Stone he is not: CHRIST

Shield your eyes :-(   Now, here's a brilliant clip from the Guardian website. It's a great insight intoi the Murdoch mind. Don't worry it doesn't contain any gratuitous crotch shots...or does it!

LATEST VIDEO FROM ION@ENTERTAINMENT.IE

Hi folks...Okay...if you've seen Tootsie and Heath Ledger in Batman Returns..throw in Krusty the Clown and maybe a pinch of Stephen King's Carrie and a small dash of Hyacinth Bucket from Keeping Up Appearances you're getting close...with a little roadkill on top. Make sure you've had your dinner :-S

WOOHOO!! IT'S LADIES DAY AT DUBLIN HORSE SHOW

Let me just warn you first...this video contains gratuitous scenes of make-up and flowery dress violence that may disturb younger (and older) viewers:

FANCY A DATE WITH MEG FROM FAMILY GUY? GET ON YOUTUBE.
(although the chances are you will require a large weapon)

First this happens...



...and then she responds:



"Do it for your country!" Yes Justin. Gos bless America.

Now, I expect that his weapin will remain concealed for the evening.

DOUBLE TROUBLE!

What in this world could possibly be more awesome (and arousing) than two...yes i said TWO Lennys. I know. It sounds insane and just makes the heart flutter and the soul fulfilled. Well, ladies and gentlemen your fantasies have been fulfilled...

Whoa...whoa. Hold on a second this is actually more about two for the price of one. It's just cheap labour :-( There's me thinking it was WIZARDLY MAGIC!

Check out the Harry Potter 7 Part 2 3D (anymore numbers to put in title?) movie premiere from The Savoy in Dublin. Great craic and a lunatic crowd.

We got into the spirit of Harry Potter by reproducing my long lost twin and bring him along...If you look closely you can see my twin's lightning scar!


"Lenny sandwich?"
"Erm, no I've just eaten thanks."

WARNING: This video contains gratuitous use of a Barry's Tea Bag as a police badge and a moustache that small children should not view unless accoompanied by an adult..it's frightening!

Here is my video from The Premiere of The Guard at the Galway Film Fleadh this week.

Brendan Gleeson stars as Sergeant Gerry Boyle (he gives me a taster of Boyle in the clip ;-) and he is a no nonsense Dirty Harry style copper. It's the French Connection (Popeye Boyle) meets Father Ted with a little bit of Spaghetti Western tossed into the mix!


The sound is a bit ropey (ah such professionals). Apologies. So, turn up your hearing aids and load your weapons...here comes The Guard!

Looks a bit Fishy...


My just out of bed look...and not ONE person up for a game of cards or pool...can't see why...disappointed

Latest video from I-ON which has it's "eye-on" events happening in Dublin and hopefully once we get a little bigger (I'm eating all the greens I can)... around the country. Myself and Conor the cameraman headed along to the launch of Hard Working Class Heroes (HWCH) the other night. It's a festival for brand new bands that has helped the careers of people like Duke Special, Snow Patrol, Villagers, Lady Gaga (okay well not technically Gaga but she texted me before we filmed just to wish me luck and mackerel) and loads of others in the Irish music scene.

HANGOVER: PART 2 PREMIERE.

Finally, I'm allowed to indulge my tranvestism...Eddie Izzard would be proud.



Some Pics From Hangover: Part 2 Premiere



Myself and Andrea Roche...she was desperate for a pic so I obliged. I'm so nice.


Bernard Dunne and myself exchanging boxing tips.


That's a beard De Niro would be proud of...he might be out of the ring
but he's still a whippet.



What's a Premiere without the totty eh!?


Hot blond. Check.
Rabid monkey in sleeveless denim jacket. Check.


Chatting to ex Expose man Sean Munsanje. Sound guy.


Look it's Paul O' Grady. Wow.

The Week of The Icons - 'BOBAMA'


Apart from the clichéd pint of Guinness shot, the baby and old lady hugging, the Tome Cruise moment on the mobile phone, the Richard Pryor inspired speech, this was the highlight for me:

Great advert for BMW. Check out how thick the doors are!


First we get the Queen talking Gaelige, then Barack Obama gets a sesh on in the before unknown Ballygobackwards backwater of Moneygall, (I bet he was probably the first black man, never mind President of The United States to sup a pint in that pub!) now forever on the map as 'Obamaville' it was an incredible day for Irish pride. Can we organise more state visits please!? In the past fortnight I have completely forgotten all the acronyms; IMF, ECB , BOI, AIB, EMF, and it's just been positivity on the airwaves. And, how much better does that feel? WEll, the answer my friend is blowing in the wind (and fuck me it was windy yesterday especially when Barack and Michelle arrived in Ireland nearly blown off the runway and then greeted by Darby O'Gillmore and The Little People) ....Okay so I robbed that 'Blowin' line from a certain Mr Robert Allen Zimmerman...AKA Bob Dylan who is celebrating 70 years on this planet but Zimmerman is not ready yet for the Zimmerframe. A living legend is a term thrown around but he is the true embodiment. A chameleon of a man he is the only living artist among a select group (Cohen, Waits, Young, McCartney, Simon, Moore etc.) that stands head and shoulders above what is out today and like a complicated fossil he just doesn't want to be "got."

"Well I try my best to be just like I am, but everybody wants me to be just like them."

Pretty much sums him up. Happy Birthday Mr Zimmerman. And thanks.

Here are some of my favourite pics of the little Jew who knew.


Taken in Woodstock in 1968 this is possibly my favourite Dylan photograph. A large print hangs in the Morrison Hotel in Dublin and the first time I saw it I just stopped. It was taken by rock photographer Elliot Landy and one day when I have some money "it will be mine!"


Simple truth...either that or waiting for the bus.


Looking like Joyce or Rimbaud this could have been taken at the turn of the century.



Good hair. Better scarf.


Classic young Dylan.


With the legend Johnny Cash. Check out their duet 'Girl of the North Country' on
Nashville Skyline. Sublime.


Braincogs on fire.


With his son Jakob.

And after selling over a 1oo million albums, the Pulitzer Prize, Nobel Prize nomination, 20 million Google pages, over 30 studio albums and at least 500 songs what can you possibly choose as his greatest musical moment? This wins hands down:



Although, let's face it this is a close second:


Yes. That is Bob Dylan rapping with Kurtis Blow in 1986 but we all know that Dylan wrote and performed the first rap song way back in the 60s:

ONE IS GOING ON THE SESH!



Security is tighter than a Robin's ringpiece. Cordons left, right and centre in the Capital. Here are a few pics taken of O'Connell street and the surounding area. I was asked for ID three times and had my bags checked. Obviously I don't mind, but today was not a good day to be carrying around my rather extensive collection of 'Weather Ladies Wear Rubber' pornography.

I love a gate but this is offence-ive... Sorry.



"If I knew you were wearing the same dress I would have changed."


"Erm, now lads we're we all supposed to gather here?"
"Yes Pat, this two metre squared area is notorious for Ra heads."


It's unusual that there's so much security when she was already out last night banging yokes at a club in Ballyfermot!


"Oooh Phillip one is mashed!"

SUPERHERO FUN RUN IN PHOENIX PARK


Batboo...I mean Babes!


The Super Family...check out Clark Kent (Dad) in the background. This lady made the Super Dog costume herself. This dog was HUGE but brilliantly friendly...there's a clip of me chatting to him in the video below...he was chilled cos he would kick my ass no problem!



Supergran? Looks more like the guy in Total Recall :-/


Super Smurf! (I thought she was Super Sperm...hunting for an Ovary!)


Out of Bat Breath?! This little dude looks a bit like Chris from Family Guy.


Little Bat Dude and his Mother aka...Super Mummy! Genius.


Even Obama and co. were getting in on the act!

Is a bird? Is it a plane?

Noooooooo, it's me dressed up as in a glorified onesy that is otherwise known as Batman Light, The Boy Wonder, the Mikey Graham of the Superhero world...Robin!

Reported for Entertainment.ie on the Superher Fun Run raising money for Our Lady's Children's Hospital in Crumlin. The weather was fantastic (I'm sure I spotted Gerry Fleming aka Met Eireann Man keeping the rain off!) and it was amazing to see some of the efforts that people went to and for such an incredible cause.

Here is the video:



If you want to see some pics go here:

http://entertainment.ie/caughtout/gallery/Super-Hero-5K-Run-in-Phoenix-Park/1449.htm

They Came, They Saw, They Conquered

Here is my interview feature with the two guys (James Wan and Leigh Whannell) who created the first Saw movie and which has since become a torture porn phenomenon that has grossed nearly $900,000,000 dollars. That is insane, but as the lads said the studio money men just sit their counting the profits waiting for more unwilling victims to become part of Jigsaw's plans. I met the lads in the U2 Clarence Hotel and they were beaming smiles on legs...their new movie called Insidious is out today and cost only $800,000. It has already grossed over $35m at the US Box Office. Unreal. No wonder they're all smiles.

Just click on the pic:



"Whatever you do, DON'T shout cut!"

And, Insidious isn't the only horror being inflicted on us today...Will (you marry me) and Waif celebrate their nuptials across the water...If two Jack Russells were getting married I would happily wish them the world of good especially if i was getting the day off! Good luck to them they seem pretty down to earth...well for people who have Granny's in Palaces I suppose. And because I have been caught up in the romance of it all, here is a wonderful clip of Wills and Kate talking about how they first met...my eyes are welling up just thinking about it...awwwwww

Sometimes these flash mob adverts get on my tatties, but this is actually very funny. Prince Harry posted this video on his Facebook page saying, "this is what it's really going to be like!" His lookalike in the video is brilliant....and Camilla Parker Bulldogs is pretty good. Dancing up the aisle to "House of Love" by East 17 is a lot more palatable than domestic violence specialist Chris Brown...those chino wearing bell-ends in that other famous Youtube monster hit melted my head.



Things I learned this week...

Pigs can have unfeasibly large bollocks. Lord help us, but how does this fella sit down...although they probably pop up in front of him like a footstool :-/

John Sullivan R.I.P.

Very sad to hear the news over the weekend of the death of a comedy legend. He is the man who gave us one of the greatest comedy characters Del Boy Trotter. A character up there with Homer Simpson as far as I'm concerned and nearly as influential especially on a wee big toothed, side parting, nobbly knee'd, short pants wearing wee man like myself. Every Friday or Saturday I loved to sit and watch Only Fools and Horses, and catch the "Rodney, you plonker!", "Mange tout" "ruby murray" "Dave" and any number of legendary catchphrases that Sullivan engraved in comedy lore in between trying to hear the jokes because my Mum and Dad would be wailing in laughter. There was a cracking piece in the Mail about the genuine pleasure of Sullivan's comedy...it took the piss but was never snide.

He also gave birth to a very special little three wheeler...one day Rodders, we'll be millionaires!

One of my favourite scenes was the chandelier. As many of his stories came from his Dad, a plumber in London, this is supposed to have happened. All of the best comedy comes from truth and one of the reasons why OFAH was s o successful is because of the believable characters.



And this wasn't far behind...

VIDEO KILLED THE RADIO 'STAR' (!?)


Although in this situation I hope that I will be able to make clips until me hair tis greay and my bowels run astray. Here's a clip of a brand spanking new addition to Entertainment.ie called I-ON (as in "eye on" geddit? very clever, ye see all those years at Uni paid off!) that is a video magazine hosted by yours truly and featuring a ton of comedy, music, movie, exhibitions and events and the punters who attend. It will be a great craic and obviously the most important people are yourselves, so if we stop you for a chat say hello! Gonna start in the Capital and then work our way around the country.

This one is all about Fast & The Furious 5 - Rio Heist. I went along to the premiere party to speak to the fans of the monster motor movie.

WARNING: This clip features gratuitous boobs, (Georgia Salpa and hot blonde) even more gratuitous attempts at comedy, loads of fans, clips from the movie, and to top it all...a fantastic Gardai outtake....stay to the end...it's gas! Wooooop Woooop!

So, please give this video some love on youtube and pass it on if you can :-)

Fankooooo xx

Heard Prendeville is back on air this morning. Was thinking of cracking one off in public and I might get myself back on the radio...Can't afford a plane so the local double decker bus will have to do. Now where did I put that dirty mac?

So to celebrate his return...I was going to suggest Return of the (dirty) mac by Mark Morrison, but I think this one is more appropriate:

OOOPS!!!!!!!!!!

I know that you have to make videos in advance, but this managed to get out and make Martin Johnson look like an even bigger ignorant ape than he is...sweet.

And no wonder they lost. Look at all the forward passes!

I plan to start my day with a bowl of gin and cornflakes, Riverdance myself to the bookies, wade through the dyed green river to a hooley, catch the eye of the highest ranking farmer's daughter, fight bare-knuckle for her honour in a hay bail cage and then finish the day off with a set-dance. So, between the jigs and the reels to pre-empt my stereotyped drunken Irish behaviour, I will not have time to update this blog on Drunken Day.

HAPPY PADDY'S DAY

Patriotic sweets. "Amhrán na Bean"

Here is a selection of videos that will hopefully amuse one:


Possibly my favourite Simpson episode:


Here's a Paddy's Day greeting from a very early U2. This looks like it was filmed around the same time Angela's Ashes was based :-/ Watch the Edge playing football it's hilarious!



The Muppets in Aran sweaters = Comedy Genius.



And for the alcoholics:

I will never complain about the weather here again. Watch as this town is destroyed in less than 5 mins. The speed and power is frightening.

FINALLY GOT THE HAIR CUT.




ALL HAIL MING!

The most honest television advert I've seen...




...and the most honest poster.

This is from a while back and is still the greatest representation of Fianna Fail (no fada is deliberate)

What a legend. I'd happily give this woman my vote. Jaysus, at least crime levels would drop!

Check this out.

As passersby ignore a gang of thieves robbing a jewellery store in broad daylight, out of the corner of the picture runs a red-riding hood figure wielding a hangbag and starts bashing the scum-bags over the head!



Reminds me of one of my fave shows as a kid:

BTW, the theme song was also sung by a certain Big Yin :-)

Well it is Erect...I mean ELECTION time! Jesus, I've been spending to much time alone at this keyboard.

So, in keeping with the saucy, sexy and downright debauched themes of Lenny's Logbook, I will be featuring some decidedly scandalous features and commentary on the forthcoming elections.

Starting as I mean to go on. After posting the 'Orgasm Voting' campaign yesterday. A tactic that they used in Spain to attract young people to the ballot box, I have been researching on how other countries have been doing it (voting that is). Let's face it, the posters that currently grace our lampposts and because of the wind - our streets, front gardens, and windscreens (I remember a woman calling into the Rooster once who nearly crashed because Dan Boyle landed on her windscreen on the way to work. Don't worry it wasn't the real Dan Boyle...the car would've been a right off :-S). Our politicians look like the cast of Orcs from the Lord Of The Rings. God, they are the ugliest cretons so it's lucky that looks don't matter and they are amazing, self-sacrificing humans willing to lead the country as best they possibly can. Take a tip from the SATC ladies - USE PHOTOSHOP PEOPLE! As Ricky Gervais said, "The people who worked on the Sex and the City 2 posters deserve an award." He's right, because if they weren't touched up it would have looked like an advert for Last Of The Summer Wine.

Anyhoo, here's a few tips for how we can campaign in this country:



1. Turn heads. Especially mens. Obviously, don't turn up to vote with NO PANTS on. Unless you live in West Kerry, I hear it's the norm there.


2. I have no idea what this means. It's a naked woman with a pen. That's all that you need to know.


3. American Free Speech is in the constitution. "America...F*ck Yeah!"


4. Again, no idea what this means. But, I guarantee her health and education legislation changes have incredible foresight.


5. Now, this man won't f*ck your economy. Can't say the same about your daughters :-/