Thursday, April 30, 2009
IT'S MY NEW YORK ODYSSEY:
Rolling in it outside The Plaza on Central Park
The Funkiest Truck i've ever seen
"Hey Buddy back the f*ck up" I love NY!
No-one is impressed when Donald does his wine bottle trick
Sheena takes a stroll
"The Cubed Crusader"
Toy Shop F.A.O. Schawartz had this Lego Batman
Don't know if i'd kiss this one
Arty traffic light sheeeeeet
Oh me neck!
Spot the ball...baseball in Central Park
SHAFT HE'S THE GREATEST DANCER!!
It wouldn't be NY without some twirling roller bladers...check out yer man....i think he's doing an impression of the Taz!
CENTRAL PACKED - The hottest day of the year in NY...the temp hit 90 and the people hit the park...a lot of people!
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
I'm still digesting the massive bite myself and Sheena took out of the Big Apple. Manhattan has to be one of the most polished and pulsating cities i've ever been in. From the dude belting out Beethoven on the Subway, the guy playing with a saw, the horses eating at a hot-dog stand and the naked cowgirl (girl? it was more like GRANNY!) in Times Square, record temperature's in the city (nearly 90 degrees on the Sunday) and munching in Bob De Niro's restaurant! And then we saw this! - Walking towards the ferry point to catch the Staten Island Ferry which brings you across the water to check out the Statue of Liberty we saw a plane swinging really close to the buildings:
Got loads more pics to publish tomorrow!!
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Two 90 year old men, Mike and Joe, have been friends all of their lives.
When it's clear that Joe is dying, Mike visits him every day. One day Mike says, 'Joe, we both loved rugby all our lives, and we played rugby on Saturdays together for so many years. Please do me one favour, when you get to Heaven, somehow you must let me know if there's rugby there.'
Joe looks up at Mike from his death bed,' Mike, you've been my best friend for many years. If it's at all possible, I'll do this favour for you.
Shortly after that, Joe passes on.. At midnight a couple of nights later, Mike is awakened from a sound sleep by a blinding flash of white light and a voice calling out to him, 'Mike--Mi ke.'
'Who is it? Asks Mike sitting up suddenly... 'Who is it?'
'Mike--it's me, Joe.'
'You're not Joe. Joe just died.'
'I'm telling you, it's me, Joe,' insists the voice.'
'Joe! Where are you?'
'In heaven', replies Joe. 'I have some really good news and a little bad news.'
'Tell me the good news first,' says Mike.
The good news,' Joe says,' is that there's rugby in heaven. Better yet, all of our old friends who died before us are here, too. Better than that, we're all young again.
Better still, it's always spring time and it never rains or snows.. And best of all, we can play rugby all we want, and we never get tired.'
'That's fantastic,' says Mike. 'It's beyond my wildest dreams! So what's the bad news?'
'You're in the team for Tuesday.'
Monday, April 20, 2009
Friday, April 17, 2009
She is set to become a phenomenon over in the States, has had over 20 million hits on youtube, Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher are already fans and according to her she has never even been kissed! I am talking about Susan Boyle, the singing sensation from the first week of Britain's Got Talent. This unassuming lady has lived with her Mum all her life and has now been catapulted into the limelight. I am a little suspicious however, not of her but of Simon Cowell, the man with the hair of a briquette knew EXACTLY what he was doing. Remember a certain movie starring Robin Williams dressing as an old Scottish woman to get closer to his kids?? NO NOT JUMANJI...Jesus...MRS DOUBTFIRE! Well Cowell saw the popularity of that and knew she would be a phenomenon.
So, she has been wheeled out for the world's media, and here are the results:
Patronising Americans Number 1
This presenter wipes her tears with a sock. Yes, a F*CKING sock!
Patronising Americans Number 2
This one goes off the cringe scale *dives behind sofa*
Now, i know Susan is a lovely woman but she reminds me of someone:
No, i think she's more like Biffa Bacon from Viz. Remember him!? Well i think his Mum is the bulb off her:
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Yes, i know. It's the greatest showbiz story of the last 400 years...P Diddy aka Cheese Puff aka Mouthy Nobchops with more Money than brains has declared that he is now officially a floursecent adolescent and "The newest member of Arctic Monkeys" and in the clip below he warns "If you f*ck with the Arctic Monkeys then you f*ck with P Diddy" *lifts handbag* ooohhhhhh. And, judging by Diddy's antics in this clip i bet he doesn't look good on the dancefloor and the people at the party should really have left before the lights came on. Ok, i'll stop now.
PAPPARAZZO GETS WOOD
No, it's not about a saucy long lens but the second greatest showbiz story ever. Woody Harrelson attacked a Pap outside an airport in L.A. at the weekend and this was his defence:
"‘I wrapped a movie called Zombieland, in which I was constantly under assault by zombies, then flew to New York, still very much in character," he continued "‘With my daughter at the airport I was startled by a paparazzo who I quite understandably mistook for a zombie." Understandably. The only problem with attacking a pap is that they'll record everything...the feckers. Cheers Woody for standing up for A listers everywhere and watch out for the zombies...oooooohhhhh.
Look up pain in the video library of life and this will be there:
And i know it looked like a good idea at the time but some tatoos can come BACK to bite you:
Tattoo Remover - The funniest bloopers are right here
Friday, April 10, 2009
Have a cracking weekend. Good lucky to Munster who are up against Ospreys in the Heineken Cup clash. Don't miss Britain's Got Talent this Saturday or you'll miss my ex doing the splits...
...oh how i miss that woman...And finally here's my pic of the week.
...Dogs...they're great craic
Thursday, April 09, 2009
Not a good night if you are a Liverpool fan. It was a case of YOU BLUETY for Chelsea fans...I think that the Pool might be getting some of the backdraft from United's wet patch and are feeling the strain themselves. 3 - 1 OUCH! Gotta say that scoreline wasn't the strangest thing to happen during last night's match. During half-time one of the weirdest adverts i have ever seen and let's face it there has been some seriously hallucigenic commercials out there (i'm pointing the finger in your general direction Cadbury's and your f*ckin' dancing eyebrows) I'm presuming the same people who worked on that are currently on board for a particular Microwave burger manufacturer and more than likely contain some ex-Vietnam vets who are tied to a chair in a windowless basement and encouraged to describe what they saw and have it made into an advert..."The horror, the horror....aaaarrrrrrgggghhhhhhh"
Just check this out. I'm sorry but i couldn't get the idea of some fella in the factory losing his finger and it ending up between the buns... Gives a new meaning to 'finger food' *heaves* :-(
And on a lighter note here is a BRILLIANT blast from the past. Billo was on top form last night..."So lads, what is football, i mean really what is it?" Genius. Check out the hat.
Wednesday, April 08, 2009
He's back with a typical Slim Shady view of current affairs....Amy and Blake, Jessica Simpson, Lindsay Lohan, Sam Ronson and loads of other Celebrity twats take an Eminem tongue lashing:
Eminem - We Made You (Official Music Video)
Uploaded by Videozz
Those nasty people in Music copyright internet world removed my vid :-( So, just click here to see Eminem's new video :-)
Tuesday, April 07, 2009
Following on from the embarrasment that was Clare Balding and her teef comments after the Grand National (if you still haven't experienced this horror scroll down) we are doing a very special and cringeworthy Rooster Top Ten Awkward Sports Interviews tomorrow. Here's a taster:
If you wanna get "down with the cool kids" PLEASE do not attempt it live on air...Notice how the skateboarder doesn't even move...hands are kept firmly in his pockets...he is mortified:
I physically cowered the first time i saw this clip. BOOM GOES THE DYNAMITE. Watch with caution may induce serious cringing...aaaarrggghhhhhh!!!
And here is the man who has a movie on his life coming out soon. This clip is SCARY and is clear proof why the men in white coats should have stepped into the ring before he decided to much on Evander Holyfield's ear:
ADVISORY IS RECOMMENDED LOTS OF SWEARY THINGS
Monday, April 06, 2009
Maybe not. Getting out of bed today was like wrestling a small child from a computer console...with me being the small child and my bed being the console...WAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!! Armageddon awaited outside as i thought i might be needing the Kayak again but thankfully the inevitable flood receded when i attached some sanitary towels to the Micra bumper. So, on a day like today Comedy is the only prescription and here i have damning evidence that R. Kelly is infact as mad as a box of angry frogs with a cardboard allergy. Here is a song called Real Talk, a little ditty which has escaped from the bowels of his mad mind and filtered onto youtube...I think you'll agree it has the powerful narrative of Bob Dylan coupled with the sharp wordplay of Lennon and McCartney:
Beware it contains naughty words ye f*cker:
And how could i miss this?! I stumbled across this American TV show show from the late seventies. Never mind the Six Million Dollar Man, lock up the A-Team and put Knight Rider up on bricks. This is the only team that matters...IT'S BIGFOOT AND WILDBOY!
PS - I heard that the Production Values were so high that it had to be canned after the first season due to costs...sad really.
It was a crazy weekend at the Horsey Jumpy Scary Race better known as the Grand National. Unfortunately, i nearly died when My Will didnt win...(geddit!?) AH JAYSUS...forget it...anywho , apart from a 100/1 gluepot winning it was the post race interview with the Jockey that shocked me the most.. BBC host Clare Balding decided to humilitae the shy chap by bullying him into showing his gappy mouth and proceeded to tell him he now has enough money to get his manky gnashers sorted.
This is Clare Balding...
The words...people, glasshouses, throwing and stones come to mind
Wednesday, April 01, 2009
U2 ON TOP OF THE WORLD...(well Blackpool Shopping Centre!)
Some pics from today's EXCLUSIVE U2 gig:
In the words of Charles & Eddie Would we lie to you? *looks sheepish* well maybe just a little... :-)
Have they found what they're looking for?
Word gets out that the saints are coming...
Jesus those boys have some weird backstage demands!
It's U2's Moment of Surrender...the Gardai & Fire Brigade call a halt to matters
Bono makes sure he's not stuck in a moment he can't get out of!
Elvis has left the building...Or U2 have...well U2opia
Thanks a million to Blackpool Shopping Centre, the band, all evryone who came to watch and listened on the radio...NOW LET'S HOPE THE REAL U2 TAKE NOTE AND COME BACK TO CORK...IT'S BEEN 16 YEARS...TOO LONG
If you're a fan get on your boots and sign this petition and get them back
Don't forget to check out TV3 News tonight at 5.30pm for a full report.