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Friday, December 18, 2009

JINGLE ME BALLS!!

IT'S THE ANNUAL J.B.B. TONIGHT AND I CAN'T WAIT :-)
LOADS OF CRAIC AND BANDS INCLUDING THESE LEGENDS:




RAGE AGAINST THE BBC!


Zach De LeRocha and the Rage boys took a warning from the BBC "NOT to swear" on a live session of their song and unsurprisingly replied with, "F*ck you, I won't do what you tell me." Just visualise the Producer, sitting in the studio, biting her fist and mumbling, "Please don't swear, please don't swear!"

On the right of the video in youtube click on "MORE INFO" and it will give you loads of links on how to get Rage to number 1 for Chrimbo...and don't swear i'm NOT telling you to do anything :-) it's just a nudge ;-)



This is my favourite version of the song. And, incidentally it's by my FAVOURITE GERMAN artist...KURT MAMBO! GLOCKENSPIEL DER STRUDEL YA!!!!!


Tuesday, December 15, 2009

WELL DONE TO STEVE RAYNER ON WINNING THE IRISH APPRENTICE LAST NIGHT


Steve was originally born in Middlesborough but moved to Skibbereen with his partner Eileen. He now has a wee family and tghe €100,000 a year job as Bill Cullen's Apprentice will be warmly welcomed! He also admitted that he applied only after hearing myself and KC discussing The Apprentice on the show...now i wonder if we could work out a percentage Steve ;-)


I have a feeling Penny Apples saw this picture of Stephen Higgins (right) and knew he couldn't trust a man who dresses like a 12 year old wigger.

For me though there was only one star on last night's show.
MICHELLE HEATON



I wonder if she left a bronze streak all down the side of the car :-S

Thursday, December 10, 2009

BLUERINSE BRIGADE!!



Pensioners got their own back on a Financial Advisor who lost 2 million of their savings. Apparently, they bundled him into the boot of a car and hit him over the head with "a zimmer frame"...he was probably then subjected to non-stop stories of how things were so much tougher when they were growing up and forced to watch reruns of Murder She Wrote. PENSIONERS KIDNAP ADVISOR
It actually got me thinking about a certain group of lads famous for standing up for the victim: "If you have a problem, if no one else can help, and if you can find them, maybe you can hire... The GRAY-Team"


Is this the world's worst/greatest tattoo:


Obviously a cat lover...now does the bellybutton fluff fall into a tray?

LATEST INSTALLMENT OF ARANMAN THE FOOTBALLING PHILANTHROPIST. THIS WEEK HAS RONNIE WHELAN, SCOTCH EGGS AND THE IRISH COUNTRYWOMAN'S ASSOCIATION - CLICK HERE

50 CENT ON GRAHAM NORTON!
You didn't think you'd ever see that headline but it's true. No, Fiddy hasn't leaped out of the closet and in a loving relationship with Bandon exile Graham. He appeared on the show the other night alongside Jimmy Carr and Catherine Tate. It was actually pretty entertaining. I love Carr's line, "So, 50 you gave yourself a choice, Get Rich or Die Trying. How did that work out for you?!"



Here is the pic that Jimmy Carr took. He threw it up on Twitter just after:



50 Cent and Heaven scent (i think she is wearing impulse i can't help acting on it!)

And here is something I robbed ogff Dave Mac. This guy was in the Irish Examiner today and he has been sentenced to three months in prison for social disturbance. "That's a little harsh," you might say. But, wait until you see his boxer shorts...i'd have put him away for life!


Tuesday, December 08, 2009

Shane Grows his Own...ummm

Shane McGowan and his partner Mary Victoria-Clarke star in their own gardening show tonight. I'm sure Shane is not averse to growing his own Poitin and has more than most of us in common with Vegetables but tonight he gets to be a toothless Diarmuid Gavin...Here are some of Shane's finer moments:

The lesson here is NEVER ask if Shane is drinking water:


Forgot about this. I remeber being in Melbourne at a Pogues gig and he needed a stool after attempting to stand for a full 2 minutes!!



Keep an eye out for Matt Dillon in this Classic:

Monday, December 07, 2009

SOMETHING FUNNY FOR MONDAY...IS THAT O...KAY? :-)

This man sold out 20 dates in Manchester in less than an hour. He is coming to Ireland in 2011....tickets are on sale now cos they reckon demand will be huge!




IF ANY HOUSEHOLD APPLIANCE EVER GIVES YOU TROUBLE...YOU NEED TO CALL THIS GUY:



GAGA FOR LADY
?
Did you catch Lady Gaga on X-Factor? Dressed like a demented blonde Transformer, she paraded around a bath that looked like it had been borrowed off the set of The Borrowers. I also happened to notice a toilet bowl on stage, which I presumed was there after Joe McElderry controversially produced a stool on stage the week before. Fortunately, Gaga was using it only to sit at her piano:



...I think may have got the idea from somewhere else...ummm i wonder where:



Wednesday, December 02, 2009

TIGER WOODS IN C.G.I. RE-ENACTMENT

FOUR!!!!!!!!!! That's the number of ladies that have come forward to say that the Woodsman drove up their fairways. Here's a very special take on the whole affair. This might look like another Tiger Woods computer game, (although it does feature some savage swings mainly from his wife) but it is an actual news report from China featuring computer graphics to recreate the fateful night when he couldn't see the woods for the tree.

It gets particularly heated at 01:59 when Robot Elin swings for her husband's head...like Tekken with affairs:




And if you fancy really getting into Tiger's Plus Four golfing pants then check out his lastest game.

JUST CLICK ON THE PIC AND START DRIVING LIKE A MAD YOKE!

MOMENT OF LEN

We all need a time when we kick back, throw off the socks, don the smoking jacket and chillax. Even if you have a heart like a swinging brick this will make you smile. So, this is what you do...think of the one thing that is making youi really angry at the moment; it could be Sepp Twatter of F.I.F.A., it coulf be Mother Nature and the rain, it could be Finance Minister Brian Lenihan and his axe, it could even be Bertie Ahern being allowed back on TV even though he is a gangster and a crook...aaannnddddd relax. Just play this video and all that anger will disappear in an instant:

Unless, of course you despise fluffy cute kittens and they l;eave your eyes with a poisonous rash. If so, this video is best left avoided.

Tuesday, December 01, 2009

COFFEE DISASTER!

Yes, i managed to spill the beans and covered my desk in my brown muck. I have been doing the Rooster now for nearly four years and this is the first time that I have actually caused a spill. Usually, I dribble but the jitters got me this morning and my hand just flung out during Showbiz Bits. It is not just mere coincidence that i was criticising Simon Cowell and THEN knocked it over. He IS the Darth Vader of music...


I will bury the sheets of paper out the back put an X on the soil and people in a hundred years will think a treasure map is buried there...or just some illegal dumping...whichever.


JESUS, GREAT NEWS. A REPLAY HAS BEEN ANNOUNCED BETWEEN IRELAND AND FRANCE...ALTHOUGH THE FRENCH ARE INSISTING WE PLAY IN PARIS:




OH AND THEY CHOOSE THE REFEREE:



And finally please pray for John & Edward. They don't be well:



I was hoping one of them would barrel into a tree...no such luck :-(