JAWS? ...JAWS IS A PUSSY!


There is a MEGA SHARK on the loose :-S



AVOID GETTING LAMPED!

BEWARE OF HOMICIDAL CUTE LIGHTING DEVICES:


DEAD MAN GAWKING: THE CAVAN LAZARUS

You may have heard about this already, but i stumbled across it again and thought it was well worth a repeat. Here's a story of Biblical proportions.
“The Cavan Minor Team of 1959 recently held their 50-year anniversary to commemorate their All-Ireland final appearance of that year. Most of the team are still alive but one of the players, reported to be dead in the Anglo Celt newspaper the previous week, turned up at the function.” Rumours of his death had been somewhat exaggerated. It was revealed that he had infact been living on the streets, heard about the reunion, and just turned up!

Question is CAN YOU SPOT HIM?



Okay, i'll make it a little easier for you:



Yeah, incredible isn't it. They didn't even recognise him with the dress on.

Why can't we make adverts like they do in Japan?? Here is an advert for 'Curry Cheese Noodles'...ummmm nice....MENTAL:




Although 96,000 people turned up to see the show at the Pasadena Rose Bowl over 2.5 million watched online. I was too busy in the land of nod. Saw this in Dublin and it was spectacular! Check this out:


Hope you had a cracking Bank Holiday weekend. Went to see Fleetwood Mac on Saturday in the O2 in Dublin. Great venue, although a little bit souless and feckin' expensive inside for drinks and other nibbles, lots of bogs though which is nice. Mick Fleetwood had a gold plated drum kit and was dressed like Frodo Baggins but the rest of the band look incredibly well considering their past use of narcotics. Here is one of my favourite tracks and when lead singer Lindsay Buckingham banged this out it was the highlight for me. CLASS:

IT'S THE WEEKEND!!!

Not just any weekend but THE JAZZ WEEKEND...and apart from all the chin stroking and black polar necks on people with little beards who pretend to know all there is to know about the power of Jazz ...IT'S A FOUR DAY WEEKEND!!

There's gonna be a lot of this tonight...ummmmm nice!:



And let's hope to Jesus this guy doesn't play:

*drum roll*

Please put the last few coins you have in your pocket together...It's Bertie Ahern and the Gangsters:


"Ah do do do di di di do di de..dededdedede de next song is called 'The Country's F*cked' Here we go now and a 1, 2, 3, 4..."

There's also a HUGE match in the Premiership. Liverpool versus Manchester United. Please check out tghe latest installment of ARANMAN YOUR FOOTBALLING PHILANTHROPIST


And some random sheeeeeeeet:

Don't miss Conan O' Brien on RTE later on tonight. He's is being interviewed by the 'Chin King' himself Gerry Ryan on Ryan Confidential, but don't let that put you off, the man is a legend and has been for me the King of Chat Show for many years. He also has "Writer on The Simpson's" on his CV, so say no more. Check out this interview with him and Mr. T from The A Team:

"I PITY THE FOOL WHO DOESN'T LIKE THIS INTERVIEW!"



And just because i have an excuse to play some Simpson clips...here's a few to get the funny bone tickled and isgnore the piss weather:

IN THE WORDS OF C.B.G. - "WORST CAMEO EVER!"

What the f*ck was Lily Allen thinking? Succesful solo artist attempts to destroy any shred of credibility by appearing in a show that makes Fair City look like it has the production values of Lost. I heard Neighbours recruit their Actors from the local forest:



Also on today's show we had the pleasure of meeting the Rebel behind Hairy Baby clothing company, Darragh Murphy. He worked hard to get his idea for funny Irish T-Shirts off the ground and is now flying so fair play...REBELS ABU! It's a very simple concept = Very funny T-Shirts with proper Irish sayings, like "I LOVE TAY" and "Suckin' Diesel" and not a picture of a sheep in a field or an old lady who's about 400 years old spinning yarn outside a whitewash cottage up the Wesht. Check out the site - HAIRYBABY

Here's a few of my personal faves:


...i think you'll find all the girls have lovely bottoms


I don't think a day goes by when i don't her my ol' lade say this!


Who doesn't??


Babies speak their mind!

INAPPROPRIATE ADVERTS

Yes, we have all heard them. I remember an advert for a particular pet range firm which we were running out on RedFM which included the phrase, "Ooh, that's a lovely pussy." As far as i can remember it was changed as the word "pussy" has now entered the language leaving little to the imagination. Jeez, i reminisce sometimes growing up in the 1940s when i was a gay young lad who loved nothing better than to stroke Granny's pussy. Now, that is taken the wrong way. Disappointed.

Anywho, im thinking of doing a feature later this week on "Inappropriate Adverts" We had a texter today concerned at the overgrown state of his new love's armpits so here's one for you to get started:

This is for a lady shaver...More George Bush than Diarmuid Gavin:


Drink is disgusting but advert is quite funny...the reality behind this is a little skewed :-S


And finally, could vegetables be any sexier...oooh pass the brocolli:

N.B. presumably they were boiling the veggies at the same time. STOP GLOBAL WARMING CARESS A CARROT!!

Dear Lennys Log Book Legends,

I apologise unreservedly for disturbing you with the agriculturally themed Yoga childrens show that i posted yesterday. Therefore, i have taken the unusual step of placing some funny and cute pictures on today's post to bring you all back from the straightjackets.

Yours Sincerely,

Lennington



Thanks a million to Eimear at the Irish Guide Dogs for the Blind for these pics of someof the puppies currently in training...jaysus, training looks like a breeze might give that a go myself ;-) Although, you'd get nowhere if they satyed that cute, people would be stopping you every two steps!! "Aww, isn't he handsome" "I just want to get to the shops before next year"


Balls Deep


"You talking to me??!!"


And as if that wasn't enough to bring you all back from being sectioned. Here is the latest installment of ARANMAN - THE FOOTBALLING PHILANTHROPIST


HAVE A CRACKING WEEKEND LUV & HUGS

I'm afraid i have no words for this video...but please remember to breathe...

...apart from the fact that if you've ever seen the movie Platoon and wondered where Tom Berenger got his "1000 yard stare" from...i think i've found the answer:

Picture of the week:

"F*CK MOO"


Add a caption for your own amusement!!

P.S. Is it me or does yer man look like David Coulthard??

Plus. It looks like Cork has got it's very own 25 Cent or Eminempty. Check this feeeeeeeeeeen out biyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!! It's - "Carrigaline's premier Hip Hop artist Dr. Feekinstein's track "It's Alive", as featured in the upcoming documentary "Steamin and Dreamin: The Grandmaster Cash Story"

Pretty Polly...pretty polly ....PPRREEEETTYYYYYY POOLLLLYYYYYYYYY!!!!!! :-S




If you thought that was funny....check out this little warrior...

I have been accused in the past for engaging in some pretty awful dance moves...a particular favourite for many years was my "Leroy From Prodigy" rubbery legs ankle smashing jig dance. And, if you have checked out my pics from the P.P.I's on Friday night you wil also see that i am a big fan of the slow dance...especially when the legendary Michael Bolton is blasting out....Ooohh, i'm weak for a curly mullet. Well, here is a clip of Steven Tyler, lead singer with the legendary and pretty ancient at this stage rockers Aerosmith. He tries to do a James Brown style twist and ends up flying into the audience. Here is a man who was once pronounced dead on stage with his drug use...this must have come close in the shame ranking:



Shouuld've taken this guy's advice and stick to what you know...



And finally, so long to this ignorant fool and thief of taxpayers money...this Blog entry is dedicated to the removal of John O'Donoghue who bathed in glory while kids went to school in rotting mobile buildings and the waiting list piled up at the hospitals. I wonder how many lives could have been saved at Crumlins C.U.H or The Mercy with €550,000 while he swanned around untouched. HE SHOULD PAY BACK THE CASH WITH WORK ON A WARD. GOOD LUCK MATE.



just click on to enlarge...it's sickening

"I GOT A FEELING FOR P.P.I.A"

SOME PICS FROM FRIDAY NIGHT

Phonographic Performance Ireland Awards


"Justa one Awardo, give it to me" The opposition get licked ;-)


Me (with chinrest) Fiona (C.E.O RedFM) and KC


Awww, they're very proud. Award for biggest collars in the world go to me ....dressed as a victorian scholl boy for the night. Luckily, Dermot (The Boss) next to me chose to wear a fetching set of candles for a head-piece...smokin'!


We had to present a whole category, even though we first thought it was only one award! Here, myself and KC discus using the "Brian Codey assasination joke"...oooh and Miriam O Callaghan's chest.


"Era..go away and f*ck off"...KC looks like he is fighting a stroke.


Slow Dance. A tender moment for me and Colm O'Sullivan.

And 'The World Staring Champion' of 2009...

This is an hilarious and honest answering machine message!




Celtic played Rapid Vienna last night. Great name for a football team especially if they were based in Dublin...BUt instead of F.C. it should be W.H.A.

"So, who dya support barry?"

"Rapid Vienna Wha?" Ba boom chi

Anywho, apart from a shoddy performance from The Bhoys, and an impromptu tackle by the referee on Aidan McGeady, which nearly resulted in a goal for the Viennesse, the most disturbing thing about last night was Artur Boruc's neck tattoo. Celtic's 'Holy Goalie' looked like he had just been burping a chils or as i first thought..."Hold on is he taking messages from the bench" ..a feckin Secret Service Agent




AND IF YOU CAN PLEASE CHECK OUT MY LATEST INSTALLMENT OF ARANMAN - YOUR FOOTBALLING PHILANTHROPIST

OFF TO DA RAYJO AWARDS WILL HAVE ALL THE GOSS AND PICS ON MONDAY :-)

I thought Extreme Art would be painting from the inside of a crocodile's mouth or equally as terrifying...trying to recreate the landscape of Pana in the early hours of Saturday morning...SCARY! Anywho this guy was on the show with us this morning. His name is Philip Gray and he is based in Cobh, hence his obsession with the sea. And that obsession became so strong he decided to take his brushes to the max...YEAH!!! and get extreme by painting UNDER WATER SURROUNDED BY SHARKS!!



Also starting tonight on TV. Check this out. It's called Eastbound & Down and is Produced by the men who brought us Anchorman, Will Ferrell and Adam McKay. It starts on FX Channel tonight at 10pm ...but be warned if you are easily offended, best off sticking to your daily dose of Nationwide cos this here show contain some muthaf*ckin bad language ya hear!

Here's a little taster...WOO!