The was a story in the papers recently about a divebombing Blackbird that has been attacking passersby in San Francisco. Apparently, she is protecting her nest, situated on top of the building canopy. I heard that she is being pursued by Hollywood Celebs to keep the Paps away:
That then reminded me of the GREATEST bird story i have ever witnessed. Sam the seagull was a little Scottish feathered tea-leaf who spent every morning strollinginto his local newsagents and pinching a packet of Tangy Cheese Doritos...GENIUS:
HOLY CRAP THE STIG IS REVEALED:
...to be honest i was more shocked at Jeremy Clarkson's illuminous orage shirt...he looks like a f*cking traffic light!