GOOD LUCK TO ALL YOU JUNIOR AND LEAVING CERT VICTIMS...REMEMBER YOU DON'T NEED TO PASS AN EXAM TO BE SUCCESSFUL...LOOK AT GEORGE W. BUSH HE'S AS THICK AS A COW'S ARSE AND HE'S RUNNING A SUPERPOWER!!!!!

Hope it all goes well for ye whatever pans out for you but seriously don't stress...i turned up for one of my exams without a pen and look at me...on second thoughts...REVISE REVISE REVISE!!! Here are some brilliant exam answers i found on an internet forum for teachers...some of these are instant classics...comedy writers in waiting:

• Charles Darwin was a naturalist who wrote the Organ of the Spices.
• The theory of evolution was greatly objected to because it made men think.
• Three kinds of blood vessels or the arteries, veins and caterpillars.
• To remove air from a flask, fill the flask with water, tip the water out and put the cork in quick.
• When you haven't got enough iodine in your blood, you'll get a glacier.
• It is a well-known fact that a deceased body warps the mind.
• For snake bite: Bleed the wound and rape the victim in a blanket for shock.
• A triangle which has an angle of 135 degrees is called an obscene triangle.
• For asphyxiation: Apply artificial respiration until the patient is dead.
• The process of turning steam into water again is called conversation.
• Typhoid fever may be prevented by fascinations.
• The hydra gets its food by descending upon its pray and pushing it into its mouth with its testicles. (I think they meant TENTACLES!!!)
• The moon is a planet just like the earth only deader.
• The pistol of a flower is its only protection against insects.
• An example of animal breeding is the farmer who mated a bull that gave a great deal of milk with a bull with good meat.
• English sparrows and starlings eat the farmer's grain and soil his corpse.
• If conditions are not favorable, bacteria go into a period of adolescence.
• Vegetative propagation is the precess by which one individual manufactures another individual by accident.
• Blood flows down one leg and up the other.

Also we had Breeda from The Irish Guide Dogs for the Blind on the show today chatting about their fundraising Cycle to Majorca. Get more info at -

http://www.guidedogs.ie/

or call 1850 506300